


My Desolation

by leafylance



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Child Abuse, Crew AU, Depression, Insecure Lance (Voltron), M/M, Orphan Keith (Voltron), Physical Abuse, Rowing AU, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Verbal Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-03
Updated: 2018-03-03
Packaged: 2019-03-26 06:36:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13852125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leafylance/pseuds/leafylance
Summary: Keith wanted to go home. The feeling of his heart crawling up his throat as it thudded violently made him choke on his own shaky breaths, gripping onto the strap of his backpack with his gloved hands. His palms were sweating beneath the familiar, now worn-out leather. He knew this was a bad idea when Shiro brought it up a couple weeks ago and now his assumption was proven to be correct.Rowing. Crew.What the fuck was he doing here.





	My Desolation

**Author's Note:**

> Heck this is the first full length fic I'm going to post so please hang in there with me. I will be posting another one as well soon but i wanted to get the first chapter of this out.

Keith wanted to go home. The feeling of his heart crawling up his throat as it thudded violently made him choke on his own shaky breaths, gripping onto the strap of his backpack with his gloved hands. His palms were sweating beneath the familiar, now worn-out leather. He knew this was a bad idea when Shiro brought it up a couple weeks ago and now his assumption was proven to be correct.

Rowing. Crew.

What the fuck was he doing here.

His eyes scanned the faces of fellow students he hardly recognized inside the classroom, teens walking in and out of the room as they changed in the bathrooms of the second level of their school. They easily slipped past Keith as he stood in the doorway, loitering. Shiro was worried about him, at least that’s what he had said when the idea was proposed. 

-

“Keith, I really think you’d enjoy it.” Shiro insisted as he took a seat beside the smaller male, setting his book bag at his feet under the library’s table. Keith could feel the others eyes boring into the side of his head, he refused to look.

“And I really think I have more important things to do with my time.” Keith argued, the top of his pen caught between his teeth before he scribbled down the answer to another problem on his chem homework. His body was hunched over the table as he did his work, his face so close to the paper Shiro wasn’t even sure how he could read anything he was writing anymore.

“Keith,” Shiro tried again. “watching reruns of Finding Bigfoot and analyzing Lord of the Flies for the millionth time doesn’t really sound that important.” He pointed out, quirking an eyebrow before sighing and running his flesh hand through the white tufts of hair that were laying limply across his forehead. “You go running all the time, rowing is all legs, believe it or not. Besides, it’s just winter conditioning, if you really don’t like it, you don’t have to pay to row in the spring.”

Keith finally looked up from the work he had sprawled across the table they occupied. “Why are you so obsessed with me joining anyways? Don’t you have better things to do than harassing me about joining some stupid sport that I can’t even afford to take?” He snapped, brows furrowed with a frown tugging at the corners of his lips. “Lay off.

“Keith, I’m worried about you.” Shiro tried a gentler approach, tilting his head as he looked at Keith, concern evident in his expression. “I know things have been difficult at home, I can see it in your face when I pick you up each morning.” He admitted, and it was the truth. Shiro had been picking Keith up from his foster home every day for a ride to school ever since his foster brother sold off his bike, leaving him with no form of transportation, and the bus was not an option with Keith’s anxiety.

Keith flinched at Shiro’s words, shoulders hunching forward as he made himself look smaller in his seat, eyes leaving his friends once more to stare at his clothed thighs. “The Jensen’s are fine.. Mark met his soulmate, isn’t that great?” Was Keith’s shitty attempt to change the topic.

Shiro sighed more harshly than he did before. “Yes, Keith. Great, but that has nothing to do with this conversation. I know you hate it in that house, I know you don’t like to talk about what happens in there but you avoid going home like the black plague.” He tried to reason with Keith. “And you need more friends,” he pointed out. “I’m graduating this year and I don’t want you to go back to eating your lunch alone in the english hallway.”

Keith mentally groaned. “Don’t remind me.” He grumbled under his breath, sealing his lips tight as he fiddled with his fingers, feeling restless in his seat.

Shiro exhaled slowly, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms as he thought. “Conditioning is until four thirty and I’ll buy you food afterwards each day.”

That seemed to get Keith’s attention, eyes lifting to meet Shiro’s once more, his lower lip now caught between his upper row of teeth, nibbling on it as he contemplated the other’s offer. On one hand, the idea of being surrounded by a ton of strangers made Keith want to curl up in a secluded corner and die. However, it was another excuse to not go home each day, a reason to stay away from that horrifying place he was supposed to call home. Plus, Shiro was offering to buy him food which could count as dinner since his foster mother didn’t let him dine with the rest of their family for meals.

His thoughts were interrupted when he felt a warm hand on his shoulder, realizing he must’ve been spacing out, Keith murmured a quick sorry.

“It’s alright.” Shiro assured the younger teen with a light chuckle, his thumb stroking Keith’s clothed shoulder as he spoke. “I really do think you’d enjoy it, there are good people there, Keith. But if you really don’t want to do it, I won’t force you.’ He gave a comforting smile before his hand retracted, taking the moment to pull his things out of his own bag that he had previously set at his feet. He was in the middle of opening his binder for his government class when Keith spoke.

“I’ll think about it.” Keith said so quietly Shiro almost missed it. He turned to smile at the raven haired boy, but he already had his eyes focused back on his work, resuming his previous hunched over position that Shiro still didn’t understand. He watched his friend with fond eyes for a moment longer before a sigh of contentment left his nose, beginning on his own work. 

-

Now here he was, changed out of his school clothes and into a pair of black workout pants and a grey, short sleeved t-shirt. He felt like he couldn’t breathe, brain coming up with a million scenarios of what could go wrong.

What if people thought he dressed weird? What if he accidentally tripped on his way into the room of peers? What if he offended someone unintentionally?

This was too much, Keith decided after about a solid three minutes standing by the door like a creep. He couldn’t do this; he was fine living in his room, which was really just the attic of the house he was currently fostered in. He was comfortable having Shiro as his friend, he liked his quiet time to himself at the library when he didn’t want to go back to the Jensen’s yet. This sport, or whatever it was, just wasn’t for him.

With that thought in mind, Keith spun around on his heel to march off while he still could, only to walk into someone’s chest when he did so, causing him to fumble a few steps back from the impact, almost falling on his ass before a large hand reached out and steadied him with a hold on his upper arm. “Woah there, don’t fall over now. You alright dude?” An unrecognizable voice asked.

Keith lifted his gaze to the male before him. He was taller than Keith, a little on the heavier side. He was dressed in a black shirt and orange running shorts that matched the color of the headband stretched around his forehead. A friendly smile was curled onto the stranger’s lips, head tilted a bit to the side. “Uh.. uh, yeah. Sorry for, running into you.” He mumbled, noticing that the other male had retracted his hand at some point, arm now resting lazily at his side like the other. 

“Don’t sweat it man, my belly is like padding, didn’t hurt me one bit.” He said with a grin, patting his stomach as he spoke. “I’ve never seen you here before, did coach try to recruit you? He’s been asking pretty much anyone he notices in the hallways.” He chuckled, shaking his head.

Keith’s shoulders were tense, a bead of sweat running down the back of his neck. He didn’t take pleasure in making small talk with people he hardly knew. He could tell the other male was the textbook definition of friendly, but it hardly did anything to settle the anxieties pooling in the pit of his stomach. “No, uh, no, he didn’t recruit me. My friend Shiro told me about it and I came to check it out. But I just remembered I have somewhere to be so if you’ll excuse m-“

“Keith! You came!” He heard Shiro’s benign voice cut through the air with a tinge of excitement behind his words. The older boy came to stand in front of Keith, placing a hand on the unnamed male Keith was conversing with previously and looked between the two. “I see you’ve met Hunk. Hunk, this is Keith, my best friend.” Shiro introduced as kindly as ever, brown eyes zoning in on Keith as if trying to telepathically communicate with him.

“Oh, so this is Keith!” Hunk exclaimed with a smile that could cure cancer. “I’ve heard so much about you, Shiro likes to brag.” He comments and glances at Shiro as he does so. 

“He’s like a brother to me, of course I’m going to brag.” Shiro chuckled, hand dropping from Hunk’s shoulder to reach down and ruffle Keith’s hair playfully. “He’s just a little shy, isn’t that right Keith?” He asks fondly, although Keith is grumbling as he tries to push hair back into its place.

“..’m not shy.” He mumbles with a pout playing at his lower lip, cheeks puffing out in a childlike manner as his arms fold defensively over his chest. Hs is determined to stare at the ground until soft chuckling causes his eyes to dart back up to the boy he now knew was named Hunk.

“It’s okay. I’m not gonna like, attack you or something.” He pauses and shares an unreadable look with Shiro. “We should probably wait to introduce him to Lan-“

“HUNK GARRET WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?” A loud voice shrieked from the end of the hall before a lanky boy came bolting down it with an ungodly speed. He was wearing grey joggers and a dark blue tank top that showed off his arms and shoulders. “HUNK! My love, my big chunky monkey boy of love.” He gasps dramatically as his running comes to a halt beside him. “I’m over with. My life is over. Start planning my funeral. Make sure there are flowers and please, get Gaga to sing for me as my casket is lowered into the ground.” He begs before collapsing onto Hunk’s side, the back of his hand pressed against his forehead much like a damsel in distress.

“Okay buddy, tell me what happened.” Hunk didn’t seem phased by his friend’s actions one bit, wrapping an arm around the skinnier of the two to steady him.

“Look at my face Hunk! Do you see it?” He yelled slightly, voice cracking as his pointer finger pointed out a small, almost invisible, blemish on his chin.

Hunk sighed, shaking his head. “You can barely see it Lance, it’ll probably be gone by tomorrow.” He cooed, trying to put his friends mind at ease.

“Small? It’s the size of a mountain, a mountain Hunk!” He whined, wiggling out of Hunk’s grip and standing to his full height now. “Why must the world be so cruel to me?” Lance spoke to the ceiling, almost as if he was talking to some almighty being.

Keith, who had been staring at the dark skinned boy with bug eyes since he raced down the hall, raised an eyebrow and leaned in slightly before he spoke. “You’re not being serious.. are you?” He asked Lance.

Lance’s eyes snapped to Keith’s and he had to take a second to remember to breathe. This boy was the definition of gorgeous. His skin was golden and his eyes were a blue like the ocean, twinkling even under the shitty school lights. His lips looked soft and plump, even a little shiny. Keith assumed he must have chap stick on. His hair looked fluffy and Keith had the sudden urge to run his finger through the short brown strands. And god that wasn’t even all. He had the cutest freckles peppered across the bridge of his pointed nose, faint, but they were there. Keith could hardly even see the supposed mark on Lance’s chin. Could someone look more perfect?

“Who the hell are you? This is incredibly serious; I haven’t had a pimple in three years!” He exclaimed, eyebrows scrunching up in frustration. 

All Keith could think was why the fuck did such nice face have such a shit personality. “You can’t even see it.” Keith deadpanned, eyes boring into Lance’s. “There is literally nothing there, you’re overreacting.”

Lance mouth dropped open in offense. “Overreacting? What are you even doing here, this is for winter conditioning, not emo assholes who still listen to MCR.” Lance snapped, looking Keith up and down with disgust. “And what is that- is that- oh my god you have a mullet. What century were you born in? Hunk, take me away, I can’t bare this tragic sight any longer.” He let out a loud, dramatic sigh as he walked past Keith and Shiro into the classroom, shoulder colliding with Keith’s on the way in.

“Sorry about him.” Hunk mumbled quickly before following after his friend, Keith’s purple eyes watching the bizarre duo leave.

“Okay,” he started, gaze traveling back to Shiro’s who was looking at him a little nervously. “Who the fuck was that?”

“That,” Shiro began and sighed through his nose, glancing at Lance in the classroom from their spot by the door frame. “is Lance McClain.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading the first chapter.  
> Tumblr: https://leafylancex.tumblr.com  
> Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/leafylance/


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